Recap of 8/11/13:

1.  “The difference between stable families and those in serious trouble is evidenced by what happens after a fight.  In healthy relationships, a period of confrontation ends in forgiveness, in drawing together, in deeper respect and understanding—and sometimes in sexual satisfaction.  But in unstable marriages, a period of conflict produces greater pain and anger that persists until the next fight.  When that occurs, one unresolved issue is compounded by another and another.  That accumulation of resentment is an ominous circumstance in any marriage.” (James Dodson)

2.  “Conflict is an inevitable, unavoidable reality of life.  To have successful relationships, people must resolve rather than ignore conflicts.  Unfortunately, many people have very poor systems for resolving conflicts….Many relationships have dissolved because couples have repeatedly attempted to use ineffective strategies for dealing with their conflicts and differences.  Therefore, how we handle conflict will determine the longevity, quality, and health of our relationships.” (Tirabassi)

3.  A strategy for conflict resolution: 1) Call on God immediately, pray; 2) Listen to the other person, rather than demanding to be heard (James 1:19); 3) Select an appropriate time (Proverbs 13:3; 15:23); 4) Identify/define the problem; 5) Define areas of agreement and disagreement; 6) Identify your own contribution to the problem, accept responsibility; 7) Brainstorm possible solutions; 8) State what behaviors on your part would help; 9) Choose a solution and try it (be specific, make a plan, think of the benefits; try to find a win-win solution); 10) Try the solution and evaluate its effectiveness (If it isn’t working go back to #7 and try another solution).  (H. Norman Wright, Les Roberts, Roger & Becky Tirabassi).